My mom means the world to me. Though we differ in opinion so much sometimes that I want to throw momma from the train, don’t worry it’s just an inside joke, but the reason why we just don’t walk away is because we’re invested and THAT is the definition of family because no matter what happens good or bad and especially when it’s bad…family is still standing there when the smoke finally clears.
Watching my parents watch me helplessly breaks my heart. Knowing that they know that they can’t help me on this particular battle makes them feel like they’ve failed their duties as parents. I see it in their eyes. And it makes me keen on my disappearing sense of invincibility. My superhero cape thins its veil and I am no longer the reckless, Energizer bunny that once paid no heed to consequences. I am the consequence now. A big walking one. And again I am reminded of my mortality. I revert back to my imagination and become obsessed with finding a superhero costume for Halloween or to wear to my first treatment session.